Illness: The Unspoken Anger Toward Our Parents

For 15 years, I struggled with digestive problems and migraines.
The pain was unbearable, and I suffered deeply.

One day, I reached my breaking point—my body felt like it was disconnecting from me.
I was sure I was dying, and I had no intention of fighting for my life.
I thought, “Well, this is it. It’s time to go.”
Strangely, I felt at peace.

But then, a memory surfaced—one that made me upset.
I thought, “If I leave with this feeling, maybe I won’t rest in peace.”
That thought scared me.

I began to reflect. For years, I had been asking God to take me.
And I realized… I had been wanting to die for a very long time.
But in that moment, I did something different:
I asked God for a second chance.
I promised that if I could stay, I would enjoy my life and do work that truly made me happy.

Now I understand what I really did that day: I took life.
Without even realizing it, I made peace with my mother.
I chose to live the life she passed on to me.

For 32 years, I couldn’t see it.
But that day, I said YES to life.

Everything is different now—
My digestion works well.
Migraines come only once a month, and only briefly.
From a Family Constellations perspective, illness can often be a bond with an ancestor or a hidden anger from childhood toward our parents. Whether it’s one or the other, carrying it only harms us.

Exercise to Take the Life
Close your eyes and say:

"Mom, from you I take the life. I take it at the price it cost you—and the price it is costing me now. I take it with the good and the bad, the way you gave it to me. Please, look at me with kind eyes when I choose to live it differently."

"Dad, from you I take the life. I take it at the price it cost you—and the price it is costing me now. Thank you for choosing Mom. From you, I take the life with the good and the bad. Please, look at me with kind eyes when I choose to live it differently."

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